So, We hear you want to be a big time startup guy! Well, why wouldn’t you? This is the latest trend catching up in India where every other guy is the founder/CEO of a company. You have no reason to stay behind when everyone is competing. Unlike what others might say, this is pretty easy work too. You don’t need any investment or prior knowledge of the industry you want to start up in. This is just one lie everyone tells to demotivate you. You just need to follow these set of instructions and you are set to go. And yeah, you can thank me when you are there.
1. You don’t make a call, you TAKE a call!
Always remember that the path to success starts with you. You are not a normal office guy who is bored of their 9–5 job. You are a special kind of guy who is bored of their 8–5 job. Normal guys make a call,but special guys TAKE a call. Remember this the next time you make Oh Damn! take a call.
2. Know how to spell and pronounce “Entrepreneur”!
I know this could be the toughest part of them all, but you certainly need to do this. India is a country where more complex words you use, the smarter you are thought to be. This clearly isn’t one of those but shall we start with this first?
3. Write a Blog!
This is a must-must. Every famous entrepreneur writes a blog and since you are soon going to become one, why not develop this habit a bit early! Name your first blog “What persuaded me to quit my 9–5 job and become an entrepreneur!” and you are set to go. Add some fake stories about how you were about to get a pay hike and you still decided to go ahead with your dream.
4. Add “Works as Founder/CEO of ………” on your FB profile!
If you are not doing this, you are not doing it right. Why do you have a Facebook profile other than posting lyrics from your favourite love songs and copied status? It’s to make people aware of what you are doing. If they don’t know yet that you have founded a company, what’s the use of all this? Everything goes to waste. Go to your Facebook about section and edit…. Oh Wait! You have already done that.
5. Never say you were inspired by watching “TVF Pitchers”!
“Tu beer hai bc!”
I know you love this dialogue but no, you can’t use this!
And if you say in public that you were inspired by TVF Pitchers to start up your own business, Tu chutiya hai bc! We know you don’t have any original idea or content, but you don’t need to show it to others. Tell everyone how it was your childhood dream to serve the people through new inventions and discoveries. Add a fake story about how a lame action of yours helped the entire colony.
6. Get your picture clicked with a big time investor!
You need to do this. You need to get your picture clicked with a big time investor but you don’t add how that person kicked you out after hearing the lame idea of yours. You rather go on to tell everyone how he loved your idea and could invest in your start up any time which could be an eternity.
7. Post a picture of Champagne with hashtag startup life!
Let the world know how glamorous a job is to start up your own business and live life king style. Click a picture of the champagne bottle but make sure you keep it carefully back once you are done posing with it. It shouldn’t be mishandled because you clearly can’t pay for it.
Original article: http://skithub.com/how-to-be-the-big-time-start-up-guy-in-india-humour/
